Making a Bad Calendar
Once in a while you hear about attempts to make a better calendar, but what about making a worse one? Here are a few ideas that crossed my mind specifically for re-configuring the months, leaving all other variables as is:
July is now one hundred and one days long, to force number formatting to account for three digits.
February lasts for only twenty-three minutes.
April will be split in two, running from April 1 to April 13, then May will take place, then April will resume for April 14 to April 30.
September will have only odd days, and also the 8th.
December will count down instead of up.
October is now a floating month, occurring in a different place every year.
January has only Tuesdays, but remains thirty-one days long.
Every year, March and May will trade a couple days with each other, until both have completely replaced the other, then the process will reverse.
Days in November will be renumbered to reflect their position in the entire year, i.e. November 6th is now November 310th.
June will be renamed August. August will still be called August, but pronounced /ôˈɡəst/ (as in an august group of people).
What do you think?
